The Diary of Kim Hawley aged 48 and a bit…actually quite a lot

Lockdown Day 1023678

I can’t do this any more. The writing, not the Lockdown. Turns out I am really happy being unsociable and if I could just get away from my family my life might just be complete.

Thought I had caught a bad case of writers block. Considered spiriting myself off wistfully to a remote ramshackle cottage somewhere in order that I can reinvigorate my scribing mojo. Unfortunately, in the current climate, it would be frowned upon.

Having said that, the wind changed direction yesterday and current climate has been reset.

We can now go out but under what circumstances no-one is 100% sure so it’s likely prudent to just Keep Calm and Carry On as we have before.

There’s nothing to do anyway…apart from queue up to go in the supermarket. I might start going to a different supermarket though, that should shake it up a bit. My local food emporium is a bit of a chav-fest and it's depressing standing in the pool with them. YES I sound like a snobby bitch but it's true. Overheard last time I was there "don't hit your sister you little shit" the little shit in question replied "Why? You do it!". They wouldn't have this at Waitrose.

Garden centres are now on the scant list of businesses allowed to throw open it’s doors to the public, those and, bizarrely, estate agents. It appears to me at least that they put all the names of high street shops in a gigantic hat and had someone pull out a couple of names.

I did a drive by on the garden centre and quite frankly I’m not that desperate for a pot plant. That queue went clear around the block.

Photo by Christine Clair on Pexels.com

Turns out that, rather than a whimsical case of writers block, I’m suffering from a rather mundane dose of brain fog. An apparent common malaise at this time. Apparently there is a sub conscious battle in the little grey cells going on, rendering folks unable to even decide what to eat for breakfast. I have no such issue, I have trouble trying to decide what NOT to eat.

If like me, you were planning world domination: to write your memoirs, re decorate the house, teach the dog how to tap dance, make themed jams. I am currently signed up to 6 online courses, have 3 books waiting to read, bought a warehouse full of crafting paraphernalia and I haven’t even managed to sit through one episode of a box set without having to press the rewind button several times through lack of focus.

My life after lockdown was supposed to be a veritable banquet of life enhancing ventures but am now hi fiving myself for putting on matching underwear.*

The brain boffins have got your back though. They have drawn up a doable to do list:

Get Out Of Here - Go out for a walk everyday. Listen to the birds. Look up at the rooftops, at the clouds, the trees. The world is still a wonderful place…

Out Of Office - Turn your phone off. Turn it on 3 times a day. If it’s important… they will leave a message. Simples.

You Are What You Eat - Focus on eating oily fish, seeds and nuts (great for brain and mood) alongside your diet of crisps, biscuits and wine. That’s a balanced diet right there.

H2&O - Drink plenty of water…. alongside the wine.

Sounds stupidly simple but hey I will give it a go, at least you will have achieved something. I might add breathing, showering, eating my body weight in snacks and sleeping to the To Do List. More stuff to cross off.

It’s important to focus on the little wins; in the spirit of Jerry McGuire, help you to help you.

*Yes, I do and yes it IS important.